Santa Claus arrived in Abuja,Nigeria today on an invitation by Nigeria’s first lady, Mama Peace, to celebrate Christmas with the Jonathan family as well as close friends of the family but was injured a few minutes ago inside Santa’s Castle due to an explosion which the dreaded Boko Haram sect has claimed responsibility for.
Santa was on his way to the presidential villa when two tattered kids suddenly jumped in front of his convoy. The presidential guards wanted to shoot the kids immediately but naive Santa ordered them not to. He alighted from the car to talk to the kids who claimed they were poor and hungry. Santa gave gifts to them and was about to go back into his vehicle when the two kids suddenly hugged him and shouted “we be boko haram pikin” then an explosion went off almost immediately.
Santa was lucky to have survived the explosion due to the fact that he has stuffed his body with so many gifts which protected him from the fatal impact of the explosion. He however lost most of his teeth and has since been admitted into the presidential hospital, Abuja to be transferred back to America this evening.
When Hot Swen Media interviewed Santa, he said “this must be that bit*h called Karma, I have been stealing money from children’s pockets while they sat on my laps, I know that is why this happened to me.”
Via his Twitter page (Twitter.com/santa), Santa Claus said he would never step his feet in Nigeria again and no more gifts for Nigerian children till further notice.
Following this development, Nigeria’s Information Minister, Lai Ruffai, announced on Hot Swen TV “the federal government of Nigeria has decided to postpone Christmas day to the 15th of February 2014 for security reasons and to enable us prepare adequately for the celebration. We apologise for all inconveniences and our heart goes out to Santa Claus and his family.”
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